Thursday, December 30, 2010

Minding My Ps and Qs

I’m convinced I’m the MOST CONSIDERATE PERSON IN AMERICA, folks. This title is based solely on the fact that I always hand cashiers my payment in the following order:
FIRST
SECOND It allows the cashier to have a firm grasp on the coins as opposed to forcing them to teeter precariously on the paper cash money. Who cares? Shut up. You’re a who cares. How about instead of being so freaking apathetic you ask some specific follow-up questions. Please send follow-up questions to PO BOX 5882300 Empire, NY. I’ll wait................................................ Oh here's one:


Great question and great penmanship! Giving payment in change then bill order is important because one time that didn't happen and tragedy struck its strikey strikers. See below for details. Disclaimer: These aren't drawings of the actual event. These are drawings of the reenactment of said event.

That's right. A coin slid off of the dollar and landed right in a woman's cleavage. AND THEN THIS HAPPENED: That's right. She got a taste of money being thrown at her and decided to give up her job going back in time and preventing major catastrophes to become a stripper at the Cracker Barrel. End of story. So anyway. As I was saying, come see me the MOST CONSIDERATE PERSON IN AMERICA at the Cracker Barrel this Sunday at 9am. I'll be in near that wall that has decorative chamber pots stapled to it.

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