Sunday, February 5, 2012

Monkey v. Kid

The gap between kids and monkeys is shrinking every damn day. Whose fault is it? All of ours. Why did we idly sit by while NASA trained monkeys for space travel? Its all fun in game until a space monkey shits in a Verizon satellite and I temporarily lose my ability to be a mayor of a tiny, fake town.
Monkeys are getting smarter, but that's only half the problem. Now, I'm not going to say that kids today are getting dumber but I will say they need to get their shit together fast. Case and point, I recently saw a kid standing outside a grade school, eating blue cotton candy out of a jewel bag. As I approached we had the following exchange:






He opened the door and disappeared into the corridor. I’ve never seen someone put such little effort into figuring out how to enter a building. A monkey would never be in that situation because monkeys are set up to succeed. We don't ask them to leave their cage, but if we do, we train them to act along side Matt LeBlanc in award winning movies. Why aren't we demanding that same level of education for our children, America?

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