Getting Ahead Without Giving It

The best way to obtain the upper hand at work is to belittle your boss's appearance. Follow these 3 easy steps:

Step 1: Your boss says you are crappy at your job. Respond with "Well maybe I would be better if you didn't look like the Pringles guy."

Step 2: Your boss tells you calling her the Pringles guy was out of line. You say "Maybe you wouldn't look like the Pringles guy if you didn't look like the Pringles guy."

Step 3: Stick your hand out and ask for a raise. Cash. All unmarked bills. Tell her to not trip the alarm or you'll kill her family.